I began the search within myself after I my old church left me hurt. With two kids and a marriage before the age twenty wasn’t an example they wanted the youth to follow. Like every other child in the South, the church was the core of everything we did. After years of pouring my heart and soul into the church, I lost myself. The church was all I knew besides my family, but leaving the church was the best decision I have made.
When I tell people I don’t believe in organized religion, they gawk because I was the epitome of the “perfect”, church girl. But as of late, I find myself enjoying new experiences such as yoga and crystals and chakra balancing, which according to my grandma, is a sin because it falls under self-indulgence. That “sin” has given me a clearer vision, and it’s helped me become more in tune with myself. I’ve become more spiritual, and I’m not saying I don’t believe in Jesus, it’s just that I’ve found a “better me”, outside of the church.
I thought I was doing the right thing. I poured my heart into something that rejected me. Now I’m grateful for that because that experience molded me into the woman I am today.